‘The Sacred Thread’ is a true story of San Francisco marketing professional Adrienne Arieff and her husband Alex’s journey through foreign surrogacy in India. After three miscarriages, including one exceedingly heartbreaking one late in the second trimester, their physician suggests a number of other options to have children.
Foreign surrogacy was something I had not even heard of until I read this book. The benefits of foreign surrogacy include much lower fees ($30K vs. up to $120K in the USA) and much less red tape. In this case, the contract between surrogate and parents that guarantees the parents will receive their child vs. the surrogate having the option to keep the child after birth made was the factor that ultimately made the decision for this couple.
The book is lovely and honest. I appreciate the ability this author has for writing a very personal story and being able to articulate her experiences with vulnerability and without getting lost in emotion. Given the challenges of sharing such an intimate journey as well as a decision that can be both morally and spiritually controversial – this is quite a tribute to her talents.
As a person, I know I came into this world all heart. I have always had a priority value of family and was gifted to spend so much time with my older relatives and close cousins growing up. That said, there has always been a part of me that has been aware of the yogic foundation that ‘we are all one’ and connected in some higher way. Because of this, I do my best to see the world with more openness and less judgement.
My first encounter of less than traditional ways to create family was when my neighbor growing up asked her mother to be the surrogate for her first child. She was a young bride and due to extensive medical issues was not able to hold her pregnancy on her own. It was magical to even know this was possible – that a couple who wanted children so much would have this choice. It was also an incredible treasure to see her mother give this gift to her daughter (let’s face it – no pregnancy is ever ‘easy’) and to imagine the bond grandmother would have with her grandchild.
I have been repeatedly been given the opportunity to continue to explore the questions asked in this book as my own family tree has grown exceedingly complex and through the honor of sharing the experiences of my clients and friends as they build their families. It has been a wonder filled road to see the extensive lengths women/couples have gone through to become mother’s and parents. The gift of family and children – whatever route it takes to create it – is one of the most important ones life has to offer. It seems fairly perfect to me that this story takes place in India – the country that gave us the gift of yoga. It is a sacred place that clearly supports the magic of dreams coming true and reminds us to create space in our bodies, minds and especially our hearts to see and experience the world in new ways.
‘The Sacred Thread’ was a present to our community by the publisher. Please contact me if you would like to borrow it and I will send it to you. I also enjoyed visiting ‘The Sacred Thread’ web site (www.TheSacredThread.com) to see photos of Adrienne, her surrogate Vaina, and her two twins – Emma & India. I welcome thoughts and opinions to be shared below. ~ Debra







